Thursday, September 25, 2008

Among us and what we're doing with it all


Among the midst of this thing called life, is a consistency. A consistency that can be very thin, almost transparent or sometimes thick as fog and chaotic trying to see anything! With this consistency, we either create it ourselves, surround ourselves with it, or simply misread it.

For me,I fall into all 3 of these categories depending on what part of life I am living at the present time. For example, on a day to day basis with my current circumstances, I land in the first and third.

However, when I have more control over how my daily routine will unfold, I will most likely fall into the first THROUGH the third. But notice something. With both scenarios, I am usually creating and misreading. :)

Yes, it is sadly part of my character to often misread my situations' details or style of life; which in turn tends to make me less grateful. Or in some rare cases it can cause me to dress something up to be more than it really is. For example a new car I might think I want or thinking I need to always be spending money to be happy. What foolish thinking!

I am not sure what brought on these random thoughts. Maybe it's because I am very observant and I am always looking for ways to improve life. I've been reading Doctrine and Covenants as well as the book of Mosiah lately. I feel my spirit change as I read; I feel it reach out and understand new things. I feel it changing in how it is strengthened by the words I read and how it recognizes the truthfulness of the words. It makes me want so much to change myself and what surrounds me, as well as what surrounds or affects my family.

Where do our true cares and concerns lie? How much of our daily energy are we putting forth toward our children, their activities, theirs and ours personal growth, developing and maintaining talents, and our homes in building up the reason we are here? I ask myself these questions and I am often taken back by the changes that have taken place since we moved out of our own place in March of this year. How much more T.V. Addison watches!! How sad it is and hard for me to accept, that she thinks every time daddy gets home from work with the car that it's time to go bye bye to Walmart to play with toys we can't buy, just to pass time.

What happened to the times we loved staying home together to play in the middle of the floor with shapes and books dancing to/ singing with music? Or enjoying being out on the lawn on a blanket with homemade cookies that we BOTH made. How about those times we went on walks in the stroller outside and not just in the mall! Or even our health habits. I have a lot to reshape once we move out and even a ton to continually work on as the current days pass. Wow has time flown by~ almost two years since she was born.

Of course I have to give myself some credit for the times we spend outside visiting the horses, cows, and swinging or coloring with sidewalk chalk. Also for the times we color and draw together inside and times I let her stand on a chair and watch me cook dinner. How precious our time is; yet it always seems so rushed. I can only hope I have shown her more love and adoration than impatience and anger...can only hope that I have taken more time to teach and enjoy her than to satisfy my own desires.

What a blessing this life is as a whole, but even more so...what a blessing each day is that we are given, that we are able to do with it what we will, given to us so we have the chance to put our life together as a masterpiece-one piece at a time! If we aren't satisfied in the end, it will be our own fault.

~LOVE ONLY GROWS IF WE STOP TO SHARE IT AND FEEL IT.
*HAPPINESS ONLY BECOMES JOY IF WE MAKE IT SO.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Your very good at writing. I enjoy reading your blogs. Hope your feeling well and I bet you cant wait to have your new little girl here!! I'm always thinking of you.

Anonymous said...

Please, please, OH PLEASE update us on the new baby! We haven't even seen pictures! (pouting face)